home loan finance blog
Today my friend Ryan Hanley is substitute teaching at the Skool. I’ll be back soon, don’t worry.
We allow ourselves to be put into boxes.
Tidy… neat little boxes that easily stack on top of each other, one indistinguishable from the next.
We allow to happen for a few reasons…
But in most cases it boils down to fitting in.
Fitting in is easy… It’s comfortable. There’s no pain associated with fitting in, no ridicule, no questioning.
When you fit in you don’t have to explain yourself. No one second guesses you for fitting in. Everyone else is doing it, so why wouldn’t you do it.
We can be lazy by nature and a nice neat box that easily stacks on top of and next to all the other nice neat boxes is by far the path of least resistance.
So Why Aren’t We All Successful?
If we’re following the path that everyone else takes… If we’re doing the things that the Crowd tells us we should be doing… Where is our success?
The way we dress, the way we talk, how we introduce ourselves, the way we describe our skills and accomplishments, our attitude… All these factors are processed and categorized in a heartbeat by every single person we come in contact with every single day.
These people are putting you in a box.
The box they put you in is determined by the easiest way for that person to deal with you.
Let’s say I’m a salesman and I meet a new prospect at a local networking event. I’m in suit and tie, make obligatory small talk and then first opening I stuff my business card in their hand and drop my sales pitch on them.
My new prospect quickly puts me in the “Another Salesperson” Box and makes a mental note to not waste their time with me again.
See, but here’s the rub, I’m in a suit and tie, I have my business cards ready and my sales pitch down cold… This is my “Quality Salesperson” Box.
I’m thinking… “This is the way salespeople have been selling for fifty years, so it’s got to work for me.”
So I put myself in a box and my new prospect put you in a box and now I’m just another box in a stack, indiscernible from every other box.
Do you see what’s happening here?
When we allow ourselves to be put in boxes, it’s easy for us to be stacked, stored away and dismissed.
It’s hard to achieve success as a stacked box.
So if we get stacked into nice neat little boxes in the real world…
…what makes you think that the Online world is any different?
It’s not except the boxing and stacking process happens a lot faster because Online we have a Back Button (wouldn’t a back button be nice in real life as well?).
We do everything we can to make our website look like [insert favorite A-list blog] except we don’t spend the money, time, etc they did. So we end up with a semi-generic, semi-bush league website that looks the same as everyone else’s website who’s trying to copy [favorite A-list blog].
Somehow your website didn’t become the unique snowflake you had wanted it to be.
So our web visitors immediately place us into a box.
What’s so wrong with being put in a box?
Good question.
Commodities get put into boxes.
Junk we don’t really care about gets put into boxes.
Have you ever put something into a box and thought, “If this breaks my life is ruined?!”
No… You haven’t… You put like five layers of bubble wrap on that precious item and then you take your fluffiest blankets and wrap two or three of those around it. Finally, you then put your precious item in the passenger seat of the car and strap it in with a seat belt.
Important, special, different, unique, valuable, precious items damn sure aren’t going in some box.
Are you special, important, different, unique, valuable or precious?
Hell yes you are!
So why do you allow yourself to be put into a box?
The dangerous thing about the boxes we put ourselves in or allow ourselves to be put in is we begin to accept our boxes, or at least tolerate them. Our boxes become easy and familiar and ultimately they become who we are…
…even when we don’t like them… even though we know we’re important or special or different or unique or valuable or precious or all of the above.
We allow ourselves to be stacked, sorted and organized by the label on our box.
Don’t allow yourself to be put in a box.
Don’t live down to the limitations placed on you by some perceived box.
Don’t be another stacked, predictable box that can be easily dismissed.
Be the special, important, different, unique and valuable you that is unlike any other.
Talk as you talk.
Believe what you believe.
You went into business for a reason. I’m sure you didn’t go into business to be like everyone else. You had a mission, a value you wanted to share with the world. But somewhere along the way you got put into a box and that box became who you are.
But it doesn’t have to be…
The Internet and social media has given us the tools to break free from the confines of our box.
<p >We can recreate ourselves. <p >We can amplify ourselves. <p >We can deliver ourselves from the malaise of our current lot in life.
I’m an Insurance Agent by trade. I know, as soon as most people hear what I do for a living they immediately try to place me in some sort of box.
I can’t stop that from happening.
But what I can do is refuse to own that box and live within its confines. So I write, a lot, about what insurance really is about and what consumers really need to know. I’m passionate in the relationships I form talking about insurance online.
I may not be a “Success” in financial terms just yet, but I strongly believe that I am a success in building relationships of trust and respect with the people who choose to do business with my agency.
People tell me all the time that I could sell more if I didn’t write so much or spend so much time with each client… But I don’t give a crap. I’d rather build one strong relationship than three flimsy ones.
Put that in a Box… I dare you.
Today is the perfect day to stand up and break out of your Box. Be the professional and person that YOU want to be. You determine how people are going to view you and not the other way around.
Be larger than any box can contain. Easier said than done I know. But the first step is recognizing the boxes people put you in. Let it make you a little mad that you’ve been put in a box and then break the f@#$ out!